I recently spent an amazing day filled with yummy food, delicious {looking} drinks, and some of the most fabulous moms in Charlotte. And it really got me thinking about the idea of “mom tribes”, especially with Mother’s Day quickly approaching.

I know you’ve heard the term before — “mom tribe”. But what does it really mean? I’ve got to be honest, I didn’t know myself until I found myself in desperate need of one. And when I started filling my life with fellow moms, I quickly realized how important these tribes were to each of our lives.

how to find your mom tribe

what is a mom tribe?

I always like to think of my mom tribe as more of my team than “just friends”. These are women who are on my side, who have my back and who can always remind me of the positives — even when none of this always benefits them. Don’t get me wrong, I think that being able to encourage your friends — or your team — definitely has personal benefits, but I’m not convinced that these outweigh the benefits that the receivers feel. The best part of any great mom tribe though? You’re never competing with each other — only supporting each other. Because isn’t that what we all need in this tough gig that is motherhood? Unconditional support.

how to find your mom tribe

why do we need a mom tribe?

In short: mommin’ ain’t easy. But really all jokes aside, motherhood is a lot. A lot of worry. A lot of stress. A whole lot of love. A lot of loneliness {even when you’re surrounded by other humans}. A lot of overthinking. A lot of questions. A lot of questioning the answers to those questions. And when all of it feels like even more than a lot we need other moms to remind us that they feel the same way — that we are in fact not alone. Because although this may not make us stop second-guessing ourselves or worry we’re not getting it exactly right, it absolutely will make us feel supported and loved — and a little less crazy. And there’s no one that can appreciate all that “a lotness” like another mom.

how to find your mom tribe

how do you find your tribe?

One thing that I quickly realized after becoming a mom is that my time is precious. While that doesn’t mean that I don’t have time to focus on friendships, it does mean prioritizing which relationships to focus on. And I must say that my priorities often lie with women who are also mothers — especially if their kids are similar ages to mine. But finding your tribe isn’t always easy — not only do you have to really put yourself out there, but you’ve got to make an effort — you’ve got to make people recognize they are your priority. After all, isn’t this what we all want? To be important … noticed … appreciated.

First things first, you’ve got to put yourself out there — after all, it’s pretty hard to meet new people when you’re sitting in your house. Social media can be a huge help if you’re a brand new mom and are still struggling to leave the house — there are so many mom groups out there — some of which are specific to neighborhoods which is so amazing! But even just hitting your local playground — or all the playgrounds — and chatting with moms who are there at the same time is a great way to meet people! I know I’ve met some great moms who live right in my neighborhood just by chatting with them while pushing our kids on the swings!

how to find your mom tribe

You also must reach out to your fellow mamas and when they seem busy or overwhelmed, reach out again. Because after all, as any mom knows — life gets crazy and sometimes we forget to respond but this doesn’t mean we’re not interested. I personally am always so thankful when someone reaches out after a response has slipped my mind or I had to decline an invite. But as busy as life may get, staying involved with each other is key — this is the entire purpose of building your tribe — we need the connection and the support from fellow moms.

Lastly, keep building your tribe. When you see a new mom on the playground, or the mom who just had baby #2, introduce yourself and strike up a conversation. Maybe she has her tribe and feels content, but maybe she doesn’t — you can only know if you make the “first move”!

how to find your mom tribe

what my tribe gives me.

First and foremost, my tribe gives me love and support. Correction: never-ending love and support. Remember when I mentioned that a tribe provides you with positivity? Well this is when that comes in. On those days that you are second-guessing every single thing that you’re doing … when you feel like you aren’t doing anything right … when you are at your wits end, your tribe is there to remind you of all the things that you’re doing exactly right and they do so with loving words and endless positivity. On those days that you feel like such a failure — maybe you yelled or you spent the day running errands instead of doing fun, kid-centered activities — my tribe is always there to remind me that not everyday is going to be a win — but also of all the major wins I’ve already had. The ladies in my tribe also provide me with a ton of laughs — on all sorts of mom {and marriage} topics. Because if we can’t laugh at ourselves, what can we laugh at? And parenting can be as hysterical and it is trying.

how to find your mom tribe

The day spent with these amazing Charlotte moms was such a special one and I’m so grateful to have gotten the opportunity. Their friendship and support is nothing short of incredible! We laughed, we vented, we ate the yummiest food (shout out to Lindsay Kingdon) and we all left feeling a bit more thankful not only for these friendships, but for each of our amazing families at home!

If you don’t follow these amazing mamas, I highly suggest it!

Josephine @ The Style Hostess

Lindsay @ Seven Layer Charlotte

Maggie @ Polished Closets

Laura @ Smart Southern Style

Chelsea @ Haute Child in the City

Lindsey @ Lindsay Regan Thorne

Brittany @ BNobleStyled

Becky @ Indigo Row

Ashley @ The Graceful Host

Jasmin @ JLT Photography

how to find your mom tribe

Now it’s your turn, tell me about your tribe! What’s the best thing about them?

xo, LC

Design: The Graceful Host

Home: The Style Hostess

Flowers: Spruce & Co

Food: Seven Layer Charlotte

Photography: JLT Photography

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